For many, going to college is the first time that they have to live in the same room as another person. Whether you hit it off with your new roommate immediately, are simply acquaintances who happen to live together, or have a rocky relationship, these tips will help you navigate coexisting in the most peaceful way possible.
Set boundaries from the beginning: One of the very first conversations that you have with your roomie should be about what you are and are not comfortable with. This is the most important step out of this list as it sets the expectations for the year ahead and makes all parties aware of the circumstances. It is incredibly crucial to be as honest and candid as possible during this discussion in order to avoid future dispute.
Get to know their schedule: Knowing your roommate’s general schedule is not only vital for knowing when they will be in and out of the room, but it is also essential for knowing when they will need to be eating, doing work, and, most importantly, sleeping/waking up. For example, if they have an 8 a.m. class the next day, be considerate of how late you are up and about. Vise versa, if you have an early class and they don’t have class until later, be mindful that they will probably want to sleep in.
Do your fair share of chores: No one wants to constantly be their roommate’s maid; clean up after yourself. Wash your dishes after using them, don’t leave a pile of clothes on the floor, clear your hair out of the shower, and rinse your toothpaste down the drain of the sink. Additionally, if you finish the water in the Brita, refill it.
If you have a problem, bring it up sooner rather than later: Communication is key, even in seemingly minor issues. Don’t be unreasonable, but don’t be a pushover either because small things can snowball into much larger conflicts. It is always far easier to nip something in the bud early on than it is to let it build into something more serious if you wait too long.
Don’t use anything that isn’t yours and you haven’t talked about: Simply put, always ask before using something that doesn’t belong to you and never assume that your roommate won’t mind. Although this may seem obvious, unapproved borrowing is a very common collision between roommates.
Don’t force friendship: While it is a common rhetoric that college roommates are usually BFFs, that is not the case for a lot of people and that’s okay. Don’t rely on the person who you have been assigned to live with to be your only friend. Branch out and open yourself up to other people and social circles. If you try too hard to force a friendship when it just isn’t working, that can add to discomfort. If you and your roommate click, great - but if you don’t, that is perfectly normal too and you can still live separate lives whilst living together.
Clear guests with them first: Because your room is a shared space, make sure to ask your roommate before having people over - especially if you plan on having them stay overnight.
Be mindful of noise levels: Headphones are a critical dorm essential. When listening to music, watching Netflix, and chatting with family/friends over the phone, don’t play it out-loud and limit phone calls in the room. In addition, if you have an alarm set, try to not snooze it too many times or let it go off for too long.
Spend quality time: In order to get to know your roommate, you need to spend time with them and talk to them. You don’t need to hang out with them all the time, but try to get dinner or watch a movie with them every once in a while. It is important to make an effort and show that you care if you want to maintain a positive relationship.
Living with others isn’t always going to be a perfect experience and there will inevitably be bumps in the road but following these tips will hopefully help you avoid as much conflict as possible. Having a roommate is a crucial step to maturity and self-development and can help you establish people skills that will aid you in so many ways throughout life. However, if you ever feel that you are in danger or that your situation is getting out of hand, do not hesitate to contact your RA or your school’s counseling center for more serious guidance.
Comentarios